Monday 4 August 2008

Black hole of Calcutta keep on shinin

Thank you CERN for the image. Check out the barcodes!

Everybody seems so blase about the whole thing. I mean, there we are worrying about Darfur, Gordon Brown, the Olympics, climate change, peak oil, people eating clay cakes in Haiti, etc., while all the time a machine is taking shape beneath the mountains of Europe which will bring us closer to our conception of a creator than ever before. IVF has got nothing on this shit, believe me. We only have 3 days left, people!

The mavens at Lake Geneva may say that the chances of a sustainable black hole forming and consuming the earth are small, but why should we believe them? How small is small when you're talking about creating a black hole anyway? I downloaded a PDF of the installation schedule and one item on the schedule was tagged:

"interconnection of the continuous cryostat."

Another:

"Inner triplets repairs & interconnections."

The whole thing makes about as much sense to me (and I am - at least - interested in science) as Mr Spock's pronouncements on the Enterprise 'Computer'. Others don't even seem concerned about it. But I am. Maybe that just indicates the woeful level of knowledge (if anyone can detect a story arc here, they will gain a 5 point bonus) I possess on hadron colliders, or maybe it means that we are being just a little too relaxed about this thing.

In any case, some astounding pictures, I'm sure you'll agree, of a project which must rank alongside the Phoenix mission as one of the human race's greatest achievements. I will be watching closely as the countdown timer ticks.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

A truly amazing and terrifying domesday machine! However when I read Maria La Paz Casas Lino's update on Sector 12 that "a boil is about to start in the DFBXC" I realised our days are numbered my fellow humans! I have therefore taken the decision that to have any chance of survival I should make it to higher ground stocked with Bovril before nightfall this Thursday. My destination? Everest! Goodbye cruel world!

Anonymous said...

Bah. Just remember to duck and cover and you'll be OK.

Anonymous said...

Rest assured the Earth is still here in 2036.

Anonymous said...

The portents are not good. This infernal engine is scheduled to burst into life at the same time as the start of the Beijing Olympiad. You can't say I didn't warn you.

Anonymous said...

Everybody knows that Cern is controlled by The Illuminati so none of this should be a surprise. They are from the lower-fourth dimension so it does not bother them.

Anonymous said...

When I was playing, I used to regularly hear 'fans' shouting "Up yer black 'ole Luther Blissett!" Maybe they were scientists...?

Anonymous said...

Whilst I wouldn't recommend a bovril-fuelled expedition to The Himalayas nor covering a duck with a blanket, I would recommend covering yourself with Sky Chakra Jewellry as a means to survive the forth-coming armageddon.
The bright spot in all this however is that I no longer have to worry about that Mayan Calender any more.

Anonymous said...

I note with interest that Monsieur Nostradamus is wrong as usual. The Beijing Olympics kicked off today.