Coffee shop bores

One thing that really gets on my tits is people who hold business meetings in coffee shops. I mean, don't these people have expensive offices they can use?

Oh sure, the old coffee houses used to be about business deals, back in the day when clay pipes were all the rage, but today's equivalent is pale by comparison. There's nothing worse than sitting next to a bunch of suits jabbering on about sales targets, marketing strategies, or whatever else occupies their facile minds. They don't even have the decency to lower their voices. And what, I ask you, could be worse than sitting at an outside table with a group of people, spreading out your paperwork and having a goddamn business meeting? Why not hold the meeting on the bus, complete with Powerpoint presentations on your bleeding Treo or whatever?

Get this: WE ARE NOT INTERESTED!

Coffee shops should be about romantic trysts, or sneaky skiving whilst reading your book or newspaper or Private Eye.