Monday 30 November 2009

Alfie

I've been thinking about my final post for November (In order to take me to my usual annual 100 post total, I will be launching another exciting 12-post December project, blog fans. Watch this space) and did think about doing a City piece. But then it struck me.

What would be the fucking point of that? I mean, I think I've already said what needs to be said, and - depressing as that may be - I think I have been proved correct. I only saw MOTD, and could hardly bring myself to read any of the match reports, especially the one in the Bun today, which was one of those really annoying ones that didn't have anything about the game, because it was focussed on vampire (take a look at his teeth. I'm telling you. Admittedly, he can go out in the daytime without turning to dust, but the sun must bother him, which is probably the main reason for his decision to go to Hull. That, and Phil Brown's human blood players' dietary regime, for which he is well renowned) Bullard's pathetic goal celebration, likening it to the great moments in history such as Fowler's white line antics and Souness planting the flag on the centre spot after a Cup Final in Istanbul. Worth watching the little vid of that, though probably on YouTube, as big Graeme struggles to get the bloody thing in the ground, and when he finally does, it's not quite on the centre spot. Ha! What a twat.



However, as I think I was saying, given my extremely limited appraisal of the match, I thought everyone was (and is) being rather beastly to poor little SWP. I'm not sure who was commentating on the game on MOTD, but it definitely wasn't David Hamilton, so pick on someone your own size, Mr sports journalist! They were saying Shaun's goal took a major deflection, and that it would probably not have gone in otherwise. I call bullshit on that one, but it was an allegation that was repeated in the News of the Screws yesterday, more than likely by some hulking bully of a print hack who feels safe slagging off diminutive yet highly skillful attacking midfielders. Leave him alone I say! Save your venom for the Ruabon soul dancer. If you have the nerve to call such a man out.

A bollocks weekend all in all. Glad it's over.

15 comments:

Kim Il-sung said...

Is he not a great organ? Ionised to room temperature? Do people not understand this? Oh! They would be bemused by Ed Straker methinks! How can punditry be like this? This is sausageness on a grand scale!

s worker party said...

I would just like to state categorically that any allegations of bullying against our organ will be investigated to the hilt.

Scott Dale said...

Hi there,

Very pleased to see your interest in our rolling stock.

Warm Wishes from Penn.

Mike LOve said...

Can I just take this opportunity to remind your readers of my new album,"I'm Mike LOve, and so are YOu!" Why not buy one for Chrstmas?

Mike LOve's Physchitrist. said...

May I just take this chance to tell you that my patient, Mr LOve, does NOT have an album out. So please, please don't go looking for it at your local record store. And yes,I am aware that I am unable to spell the word:"Physchitrist."

The Real Mike Love said...

Can I just point out that the real Mike Love, me, has an album out. It's called "My huge butt." I have NO need of a physchitrist!

Pope Benedict XVI said...

May I take this moment to announce my own new album. It features me reciting prayers to Our Lady, but not in a rapping! Just in time for Christ's mass!

scarface said...

C'n I just say that I'm sick o dis sicatrice?

Scarf Ace said...

New scarves out in time for Xmas!:All 99% washable w/printed slogan:
City : Bride of Manchester!
Mark Hughes light blue arm
Blue Moon: without a willy of
my own

10 pounds each or 3 for 20!

Simon Carface said...

Might I just take this opportunity to ask people to resist the temptation to make fun of the fact that my initial plus my surname makes the titular character of said movie. Also, please desist from suggesting my countenance is in any way similar to a Roller or a Ford Escort etc.

Richard Radiatorgrill said...

I second that!

George Foreman Grille said...

Don't forget me! Hey guys, I live in Baton Rouge, are any of you near me?

Georges Qautre-hommes Grillet said...

Mais! C'est pas vrais! I live in New Orleans! Tell me your e mail!

George Melly (grilled) said...

Yeah man.

George Smelly said...

I live in Shreveport, can I come?