There is a tradition, started by the occasionally fine Ally Ross, and pathetically mimicked by the rarely sort-of-readable-but-only-because-I-am-obsessed-with-reading-TV-reviews, Ian Hyland, of the random irritations/random gold listings.
Referring back to my previous post about coffee shops (I love self-referencing almost as much as I love lists) and to my previous post about the sudden appearance of a group of naked women on a bus (well, I did say...) I wanted to compile a list of random irritations about living in London, along with a list of random goodness about the same subject. Given the moebian nature of the web these days, I have no doubt that most (if not all) of the items listed will be instant old hat. But who cares, right? So here goes:
Escalator (and even more so – bus) queue jumpers. There is a line!
Get IN THE LINE!!
Tube loiterers blocking corridors while staring open-mouthed at directional signage
Automated announcements on tube trains ("Please remember to take all your belongings with you when leaving the train at this station.")
No sleeping signs in shop windows
No drinking signs in parks
No smoking signs in shops where nobody has EVER smoked and where nobody ever WILL smoke.
Brass hat bullshit.
Over-enthusiastic chuggers (all chuggers)
Locked squares for residents only
The smell of McDonalds
The smell of Subway. Subway in general. Six inch or foot long? Cheese on both sides? Honey mustard dressing? WTF?
New Kent Road
Cycling through Regents Park in the morning (not in the evening)
Cycling over the Millennium bridge
Encountering good tube etiquette (is there no such thing as a bus alternative?)
The smell of the tube (really!)
The smell of a good greasy spoon. A good greasy spoon (strictly speaking, this is an Oswestry reference, but I just had to put it in) in general. Fresh crusty bread, nicely done bacon, an excellent cup of tea. Lovely.
Football matches in Finsbury Park (OK, so this is Hackney Marshes, but I couldn't find any pictures of a match in Finsbury Park)
The City of London dragons
Old Pye Street
Cold Bath Square